A brief antidote

Tonight I’m off work and my anxiety has been building. No discernible reason, just the slow bubbling cauldron got it’s heat turned up and the tar began to boil over a little. Nothing could shake it, and ordinarily a nice long 3am fast drive on empty roads would have helped but my car is a little dodgy right now, I think it’s the brakes. It’s going in on Monday anyway. But tonight I was left with the bubbling cauldron getting worse.

I’d read over the last few days that anxiety is a fight or flight response. I love chemical breakdowns of why stuff like this happens. And with anxiety, there’s rarely a fight or flight to have to see it off. So, midway through washing up I decided to go out in the rain at 5am and walk as fast as I could round the block and home again. It only took me 6 minutes but I do feel a little better. It’s about the only exercise I feel able to do… oh no, now thoughts of how useless I am for not being able to exercise are creeping in. I’ll wrap up and distract.

 

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